John & Marsha decided that the only way to have a Sunday afternoon
quickie with their 8 year old son in the apartment was to send him out
on the balcony with a popsicle and tell him to re****t on all the
neighbourhood activities.
He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation:
"There's a car being towed from the parking lot" he shouted.
A few moments passed.
"An ambulance just drove by"
A few moments later,
"Looks like the Anderson's have company" he called out.
"Matt's riding a new bike....."
"The Coopers are having ***!!"
Startled, Mother and Dad sat up in bed!!!
Dad cautiously asked "How do you know they are having ***??"
"Jimmy Cooper is standing out on the balcony with a popsicle too."
A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the
front door.
"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner." She rubbed baby oil all over
him, then dusted him with tal*** powder.
"Don't move until I tell you," she said "pretend you're a statue."
"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh it's a statue," she replied "the Smiths bought one and I liked it
so I got one for us, too." No more was said, not even when they went to
bed.
Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a
sandwich and a beer.
"Here," he said to the statue, have this. I stood like that for two days
at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing."
A man walked into a pub, went to the bar and ordered a beer.
"Certainly Sir, that'll be ten cents."
"Ten cents?" the man exclaimed.
He glanced at the menu and asked: "How much for a nice juicy steak and a
bottle of wine?"
"A dollar," the barman replied.
"A dollar?" exclaimed the man.
"Where's the guy who owns this place?"
The bartender replied: "Upstairs, with my wife."
The man asked: "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"
The bartender replied: "The same thing I'm doing to his business down
here."
regards
Ray
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